We all have strengths, weaknesses and skills that we use in everyday situations. It's time to learn how you can unlock these skills.
I was always the quiet one, at school I’d get on with my work, pretty much keeping myself to myself. In my first job, I tried to speak out once and suffered bullying by a senior member of staff, choosing to keep quiet and not tell anyone.
I never got promotion because I became afraid to speak out; I perceived it as my weakness, my Achilles heel. So what changed?
I learnt that my perceived weaknesses were actually my strengths.
The quiet shy person actually observes a lot more than most. When I sit quietly in the corner I am observing the body language, the energy of the individual as well as the words.
It was this that made me decide to become a hypnotherapist. Often when an individual comes to see me there is a barrage of underlying beliefs and behaviours triggering the reason for their visit.
I make it my mission to empower as many people who walk through the door to my office as I can. I do not try to control them. What I do is help them to show fear the door and realise that anxiety is ok, as long as they’re in control of it.
A great example is one of mine. I could never have imagined standing on stage talking to a crowd of people. Yet three years ago, I hired an auditorium and spoke to an audience about weight loss for over two hours.
A few years ago the thought of this would have sent me running, my voice would have speeded up to almost break the sound barrier and I would have glowed like a tomato from the head down.
How did I learn to control it? My breath. I learnt how to slow it down and as I did, the redness, my speeded up voice and my anxiety disappeared. I also realised I was actually enjoying myself. I was making jokes and the audience were laughing back.
If you had to list your strengths, what would they be?
Mine would be:
Great listener with my eyes, ears and awareness.
Compassion. I am a helper but I also learnt not to be a doormat.
Quirkiness. I am liable to dance in the rain, sing out of key, and make a joke or two.
Many years ago, I would have seen the quietness as a hindrance but now I see it as a super-power, allowing me to see beyond what others see.
My compassion also used to feel like a burden around my neck. Now it feels like wings that let me to take my message to the highest heights.
And my quirkiness? For many years it was like a hidden treasure, only seen by a chosen few close friends. Now I stand on mountain tops, singing songs and blowing my trumpet loudly.
Make a list of things that you feel have been holding you back.
On the other side of the page make a list of how you can change them to make then your uniqueness.
Because that’s exactly what I did and so can you.
If you need some more help, look at my page on Hypnotherapy for Self-Belief.